flèche up
The News with a touch of humour
Publication date: 2020-03-22

Containment? These businesses don't suffer of it...on the contrary 😏

We wondered which businesses will recover during this coron-apocalyptic crisis, and even those who will get a bunch of money. 
Here is our diagnosis (beware it's crazy) 😇:

 

- Lo-lo-lo-tus, or any other brand of 🧻: this is not a surprise, we know that it is our pretty little tushy that is more important than everything else. We even wonder if these companies suspected the turnover they were going to generate ... who knows? 🤷‍♀️

- Family lawyers: it's no longer possible to kick Jacky out if he hasn't done the dishes ... attention Mr laweyer, rest a bit, once the confinement is lifted, it may rain down demands of divorce. A little thought for polygamists ...

- Notaries: since we are staying more or less in the same sector, imagine those who will be struck out of their parents' will! 😂

- Psy: online consultations for all the reasons mentioned above (except the 🧻). We imagine that the consultations after the confinement will be fine.

- The decanters of filtering water (Brita & co): because we do not run in the shelves with 15 packs of water, it is not a bad solution, we tested (no they did not pay us to advertise don't worry)

- Skype (zoom and others ...): e-aperitif, e-family dinner, e-dating ... canap'events by la Joyeuse Equipe (okey there it is a little wink ahah). Skype, our little Luxembourger although part of the giant Microsoft, will see its notoriety make BOUUUM.

- Netflix and other streaming : everyone is talking about it, the majority of people subscribe. It must be said that they took advantage of it by increasing their prices ( breaking news , they reduce their speed in Europe, so the resolution will take a hit). Big up for a large international paid streaming channel that has added another paid channel to their platform (#moneymoneymoney).

- **** HUB : films for lonely lovers, premium version offered in France and Italy (click on the 🍑 if you want to know more). They should be partners with Lotus, who knows?!

 

In any case, we had fun imagining these little #sarcasmforever scenarios, other ideas?

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